As i mentioned in my last post, i was going to meet up with a friend, which did occur. So, i thought i'd give you a little insight into how this went for me.
A stand out in the morning for me, was that i found myself experiencing a sudden burst of anxiety. I'm not convinced that i was having a panic attack but then again, sometimes it's hard to say. I was annoyed that it was happening & i couldn't understand why it was but lets face it, there are many factors that could've triggered it. A few being - I was meeting this friend in person for the first time, I would be travelling out to an area i'm unfamiliar with & isolating myself because of my swallowing disorder means this isn't a situation i've put myself in for a long while. Of course, we don't think like this during experiencing bad anxiety though now do we?
My Mum drove me to the shopping center we were to meet up at & the funny thing was, i didn't feel anxious during this. Maybe it was because i released most of my anxieties earlier? Then again, who knows when it comes to anxiety?
For a little while, i felt awkward with my friend. Well, maybe it was more of a nervous energy. The kind i think a lot of us experience a lot anyway. I think the biggest struggle for me was, to find some sort of independence. So, i just kind of started to throw myself into things after a little while. Whether it be leading the way, ordering at a cafe, browsing through things in a store & etc, it helped make that nervous energy settle a little. Of course, chatting with my friend helped too.
All up, i would say that i achieved a lot during this experience & above all, i had a great time with my friend & we're already thinking of other things to do in the new year.
I hope some of you get something out of this post. For me, it helps me realise that i can do things despite my swallowing disorder, despite experiencing anxiety.
As a side note - in terms of the group therapy, i messed up & went to the wrong location on Tuesday (I don't function well with a migraine), so i won't be getting there until after Christmas now but once i do, i'll be sure to update you all about it.
In terms of Christmas, my family & i are going to stay with other family in the country. The thought gives me anxiety but just like i've said, i met up with a friend, so i'll find my way through this too.
Anyway, let me know if you like this post & would enjoy seeing more like this.
Merry Christmas & a happy new year to you all!
Catch you all again soon,